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10 Years On

Fathers Forever has been gathering regularly for 10 years — hard to believe. I’m willing to bet that, regardless how long it has been since each dad in our group lost his child, at times (perhaps a lot of the time) it feels like yesterday. Similarly, I clearly remember Fathers Forever’s initial breakfast meetings in a […]

My lesson from Capt. Kirk

Yesterday I was driving along listening to a radio program and all of a sudden I hear an insight into death and grieving I never expected. Here I was listening to a bio of William Shatner (of all people) and Captain Kirk is giving me a concise definition of hope after death: “Life doesn’t have […]

Thought for the Day

“We deceive ourselves when we fancy that only weakness needs support. Strength needs it far more.”— Sophie Swetchine  

Planning to Feel

Just a thought… I’m working with a client on developing a new strategic plan. They need one for a variety of reasons, including that so much of what they are doing is reacting to what comes at them day after day. Similarly, I know I often react to thoughts and feelings related to my losses. […]

Tell a Story

Yesterday I saw part of an interview on either CNN or Fox News. The father of a young woman who died…this past year or two…said he gets a lot out of telling a story about his daughter, especially telling one during the holiday season which is a particularly painful time. He said something like, “Do […]


“Feelings are the internal reactions generated by our own interpretations of people, events and life experiences.” –William J. McKay

Sweet 16

This week Natasha would have turned 16.  It’s the eighth time we’ve celebrated her birthday without her.  Each year on Dec. 17 we host a group of her friends and their families at the local Chinese restaurant for dinner.  I look forward to these gatherings — even though they are bittersweet — because they give me an opportunity to picture […]

“Grieve” is a Verb

Consider all the ways we act on the sorrow and the loss. We mourn. We make decisions about various things surrounding the loss, and act on them. As I read Joe’s post, I noticed a number of actions. He and his wife sought counseling. He acts on his day by day determination. He and his […]


 Hello Everyone- This Wednesday will mark the 5th observance of my son Eric’s sudden and tragic death at the hands of a drunk driver. He was a freshman in college, home for Thanksgiving, and three weeks shy of his 19th birthday. He was a passenger in the right-rear seat of a car driven by one […]


At, HOPE is defined as “the feeling that what is wanted can be had or that events will turn out for the best…” How much is HOPE in your vocabulary? What do you HOPE for? What do you get out of HOPING?